Why can’t you find authors who can communicate about themselves? Who can give you fascinating peaks into their lives…consistently? Who let you become their friends.
You would think, since authors know how to create whole worlds from scratch that they would easily be able to let you into their own, very real world. Doesn’t this sound like a natural thing to be able to do? I think it does! lol
Which is why I thought it would be so easy to find an author blog – even just one! – where I felt like I could connect with another author. After all, I have a blog as an author…doesn’t everyone else?
It seems that I was wrong! (Not that that is too surprising…or at least it shouldn’t be since I live with a toddler who can already say, “Oh, mom!”)
In all my searching last night, I couldn’t find an author blog (at least, one written by an author that I read! I didn’t look for one by an author I’m not familiar with…) that had more than the cursory updates every few months about a new book release or discount. I mean, who wants to read a sales pitch anyways from someone they don’t have a connection with? Why even bother with a blog if that is all you are going to write!
I am going to try very hard here to not get carried away on a communication rant! lol
Why? Because communication matters to me. Real connection matters to me. So I always think it matters to everyone else.
But it seems like my fellow writers have a surprising challenge…and that is authentic, deep, meaningful communication and connection. At least online!
Because, just like in dating and other close relationships, if you don’t reveal things about yourself – let someone get a peak at the real, authentic you! – then you won’t ever make meaningful connections. Who ever was able to cultivate a friendship without conversation that let their true personality shine through? No one that I know at least.
Now, I get why this can be. I mean, it is definitely easier to not put yourself out there – your real self – and face the fear that no one will respond to you. That no one will care. Plus, when you write fiction, creating new worlds in your head all day long, it is super easy to have your fictional worlds and characters become almost real to you. And since your fictional friends know all about you (and your main character)…its easy to kind of think everyone else does too.
But if writers (sometimes myself included! It takes me a while, too, to detach a bit from my fictional worlds when I close my computer on my writing!) could just take a deep breath and see the real world with fresh eyes…and then take the chance on showing people what they are really like…the result would be amazing!
Now, this goes for everyone. I just found it shocking that writers (okay, so novelists) had such an incredibly hard time with reveal a part of themselves in order to make friends with their readers! But, we all have a little bit of a communication problem. Myself included.
Oh, sure, I am rarely at a loss for words when in person with someone! And for that matter…I am rarely at a loss for words on my blog! (Please do tell me if I ever get too long winded…my husband does. 😉 ) For a time, though, when I started writing…just out of school (well, I suppose technically I was still IN school, but I was almost finished with my degree!) I did find it a challenge to write in my own voice. Especially since all day long I wrote in the voice of my clients as I wrote their add copy for them and focused on THEIR content marketing.
Once I finally rediscovered my own voice (and I am so glad I did! I hope you are too! 🙂 ) I thought I had this whole communication thing down pat. And then I discovered Facebook Live. And Instagram Live.
Now, for those of you who only know me online, or who are new to my blog, you might not know that I am not very comfortable with public speaking. I just sort of freeze up. Sure, just like a blog post a Facebook Live is sort of a one sided conversation (but when you leave me a comment below, it will become more two-sided! 😉 ). However, it just felt like my old Public Speaking class in college all over again when I first approached the idea.
Then I tried it. And I was exhilarated afterwards! Now….I still struggling with “stage fright” (or would it more appropriately be termed “screen fright”?) before a Facebook Live. Hence, the lack of them recently.
But, when I do face my fears and create a Facebook Live, or another sort of video, I am instantly flooded with connections, inspiration, and motivation!
So, my dear, dear readers and friends: do you want more meaningful connection in your life? More inspiring relationships? Then face your fears with me and jump into that form of communication that is holding you back. Move on from biz and creative loneliness and run towards beautiful connection! I’m running right along with you.
Life should be lived passionately and beautifully…with blissfully deep friendships ❤
Leave me a link to your most recent piece of communication in the comments below! And, if you want to connect with me outside of this blog, check out my Instagram and Facebook pages! (And again, send me a link to yours!)
Have a blissfully beautiful day!